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Friday, June 26, 2015

Why Failing Doesn't Make Me A Failure

www.fatgurlinside.comRemember a few weeks ago when I excitedly shared my new journey with the Whole30 program? Remember hearing anything about it since then? No? Well, that's because I FAILED!

I did great with the program for the first 11 days—getting through the headache stage, and then the tired stage. I was actually starting to feel great! Then it was Grandma's birthday and we decided to treat her to dinner. She chose Chinese, and my resolve with the Whole30 crumbled.

At dinner that fateful night I prayed to God that I wouldn't regret the decision of going from super clean eating to Chinese takeout. You may think that prayer was a joke, but it wasn't. I was fearful of the repercussions of this decision, and yet it was my decision to make. Thankfully I had no side effects from eating the Chinese food—actually now that I think about it I felt better after eating Chinese that day than I ever have before. Weird.

But that lack of repercussion kind of opened up a can of worms. I had to wonder why I was following this plan to "feel better" when I had cheated with the WORST meal one could cheat with and still felt great. Why should I keep up with this strict eating plan? So I didn't.

But you know what? That does NOT make me a failure! One thing I've been learning on this journey to health and fitness is that it's about bettering myself, not perfection.

Can I walk away from the Whole30 with new knowledge that I can appreciate and implement when I feel like? YES! Did I learn that I can say "No" to all forms of sugar, except what is naturally found in fruits and veggies? YES! That was a huge step for me. I am a sugar addict, and am realizing the truth of that statement more and more. But I don't have to allow that addiction to control me. Instead I have the power to choose.

Maybe you have failed at your diet, exercise plan, or while trying to break a bad habit, etc. Know this, YOU are not a failure, and YOU have a choice every time you fail to learn and grow through that failure into a better you.

I can hear my husband quoting Batman right now: "Why do we fall, Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up."

Dani the Fat Gurl Inside

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Mirror, Mirror On The Dressing Room Wall

Mirror, Mirror On The Dressing Room WallYou had a fun day of shopping. The store had so many new styles and clothes to try on. Your arms
are full of cute skirts, dresses and tops.

Then you walk into the dressing room, and maybe it's the dirty floor, or the bad smell, or the dingy mirror, but nothing looks flattering on you. Your day of shopping quickly goes south.

You end up leaving the dressing room without purchasing anything. Not because nothing fit you, and not because you didn't like the things you tried on, but, honestly, you just didn't feel good. Your self-confidence isn't what you want it to be. You're not comfortable with your body, and so shopping for clothes just doesn't seem fun anymore.

Ever been there? I have.

I can't tell you how many times I've gone into the dressing room super excited to try on an outfit only to leave feeling awful and not buying anything. Yes, it may help my wallet, but it's no fun!

Yesterday I went to a local store and picked up 11 items to try on. I knew I wasn't going to buy them all, and I knew some wouldn't even fit me due to the how various brands handle their sizing. (Seriously, can't we get a consistent sizing system?)

For the first time in forever—insert Disney song ;-)—I felt good trying on clothes!

Is my body exactly where I want to be, no, but my body FELT good, and that made a world of difference. I have been eating healthy so I don't feel bloated or yucky. I feel proud of where I am. I like the progress I have made, and I will celebrate that. I have confidence in my own skin and in who I am as a person, not just what I look like.

Experiencing this made me want to work even harder to help more people go to the dressing room with confidence and actually ENJOY the experience. That's why I do what I do. Yes, it's my job. But it's my job by choice. No one is making me do this. I do it because I am passionate about it. I love helping people, and if I can transform how I feel about myself then I know you can too!

Dani the Fat Gurl Inside

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

The Elephant Escaped The Room

Recently I wrote a blog post entitled "The Elephant in the Room" sharing some of my personal struggle this winter with depression, infertility and overall sadness. As I tried to come up with a title for this post the idea of the elephant escaping that room came to mind and here are a few reasons why.

First off I've completed over a week of the Whole30. I haven't cheated at all, have had some DELICIOUS meals, and I feel great! The headaches and being tired are gone and it's been smooth sailing this week. I love that at this point I'm starting to realize how good healthy food can be. You might have to be a little creative, plan ahead and do a little more work, but coconut crusted chicken with marinated asparagus and homemade seasoned fries are WAY better than any fast food restaurant. It is empowering to stick with something that is HARD and I'm proud of my commitment so far.

What else? What else? Oh! Beachbody has an awesome new workout coming out next month called CIZE. It's a choreographed dance workout by Shaun T and it's going to make working out super fun! Beachbody On Demand members get special access to one workout called You Got This. It's 40 minutes long, but flies by, and is super fun. If you want to check out this new program I can get you a code to a free 30 day trial of Beachbody On Demand. Just comment or contact me if you are interested.

Finally, the hubby and I just booked our flights to head out to California in two weeks. He's photographing a wedding, and we thought it would be fun to make a trip of it. We plan to see San Francisco, the Redwood Forest, Discovery Kingdom, Santa Maria, LA, Hollywood, and Magic Mountain! To name a few :-)

It's kind of humbling and sad for me to think of where I was this winter, so selfish, so focused on the one thing I couldn't have, and feeling like I didn't deserve what I was going through. (Check out my post The Elephant in the Room to get the full story.)

Right now at my church I am doing a Bible study called "God's Perspective When Life Hurts," by Darlene Kordic. It's been the perfect thing right now to put my life into perspective. I am so blessed, and I don't deserve one bit of it, but I will do my best to enjoy it to the max and remember that every good and perfect gift comes from the One who loves me more than anyone else. I will also choose to remember that when things aren't going my way He has a perfect plan that will grow, mold and work me to be who He wants me to be!

Dani the Fat Gurl Inside